When Life Happens

Living Under a Cloud of Uncertainty

When life happens, what will you do?

This morning I woke up to the sunshine, a typical Florida day, but a heavy cloud was weighing me down. Days prior, the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, I was messaging with a girlfriend and she was sharing her struggles. Her husband has been living with a terminal disease for ten years and for a mother the years have been taking their toll. Later that day she messaged, her husband was in the hospital with a complication and she was preparing once again for goodbyes. They did not think he would make it past Thanksgiving. Life was happening.

The morning of Saturday, December 3, my friends up north would be spending time together celebrating our friend’s life and grieving with my girlfriend, their three sons, and his family. Logistically I was unable to be present, so I grieved from afar. The days following his death leading to his service my girlfriend group was messaging, we were sharing memories and part of me felt left out. Life was happening without me.

When Life Happens, Life Will Go On

Twenty-sevenish years ago, I introduced my girlfriend to her future husband. I could not help but feel guilty over the years that my match-making brought on such pain. But together they created three beautiful boys and those boys had a father who loved them dearly. He demonstrated to his boys true courage. My match-making brought together two friends who created life. Life will continue to happen.

While my friends and our community pulled together to celebrate our friend, my husband and I sat with a loved one while she was fighting her own battle. She was sharing with us her wishes and how she wished to live her final days. This woman is the strongest and healthiest woman I have ever known, but is helpless as death creeps in. On that day I was grieving a life stolen from a young family and another life which was not ready to end. Life was happening to me, but being taken from others too soon.

Living Under a Cloud of Uncertainty

When life is happening we live under a cloud of uncertainty and it can take us to the darkest of places. Many go through life living in the dark. We can become paralyzed with not knowing what the future holds. Anxiety is debilitating and many of us feel so very alone. Life will continue to happen with or without coping skills.

When Life Happens Lean On Your Faith

The common thread these three share is their relationship with God. All three were given a bad deck of cards. My girlfriend kept her faith and had three boys to keep her going, while her husband’s faith deepened to get him through ten years of enduring the pain of the disease. And my loved one was surrounded by her family to offer support during her time of need. Her faith unwavering. As believers our spiritual life will continue to happen even in the life thereafter.

A rainbow is symbolic of a loved one finally being at peace.
Following the service my friends received a sign. A rainbow stretched across the sky, signaling our friend was at Peace.

As believers our spiritual life will continue to happen even in the life thereafter.

Karen Esbenshade

“This is my command – be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9 NLT

In Loving Memory of Joe https://lancasteronline.com/obituaries/joseph-l-blazek/article_46350e63-7bd7-5467-8c42-759c41e8aeae.html

As an imperfect human my growth has been spurred on by a life catastrophe, because I chose to ignore my struggles. Instead of choosing to look inward and identify the source of the problem, which was ME, I placed blame on the society around me. The end result was to numb my discomfort and quell my anxieties with that one glass of wine. By the grace of God I was able to seek forgiveness and unearth my flaws. Through sharing with others I was able to accept my flawed self and learn I did not need to suffer alone. The result peace, from a loving God, not the spirit in the bottle.

What are your struggles?

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