No one, I mean no one (including you) should get away scot-free from committing a heinous crime. If you do the crime, you will do the time. I am a firm believer that justice should and will be served. Even for those who in their hearts know they are guilty, but got away with it. You have to live with what you did. The act of redemption is what allows us to live a life free from our sin.

Today, June 27, 2025, once again, I found myself in court surrounded by common criminals.

Four years ago, June 25, 2021, on this very Friday, I sat in the exact same courtroom, asking for grace. My offense assaulting a police officer, resisting arrest, while I was intoxicated.

Today it was a waiver hearing for a speeding violation (the last time I received a speeding ticket and/or a traffic violation was twenty-seven years ago).

It wasn’t a trial to exonerate me, for I had already pleaded guilty. Simply to ask for leniency and minimize the damage. I didn’t feel remorseful for my actions (I wish I would have fought the ticket). I didn’t want the points tarnishing my clean driving record.

The last four years God has been working in my life. It’s instances like this one that I use as proof. Once I determined this coincidence between dates I called my daughter to share with her my news. She said, “Mom maybe this has something to do with redemption?”

Redemption – What is it?

My first court appearance was pivotal. The intentions I had then were different than my most recent court appearance. The actions that led me to court were so egregious, I myself could not get past them. I was looking for grace and the court offered mercy. Redemption was to follow.

Redemption per Oxford dictionary is the action of saving or being saved from sin, error, or evil. Or, the action of regaining or gaining possession of something in exchange for payment, or clearing a debt.

What needs done before redemption?

We need to be able to acknowledge our crime and accept responsibility. The following is part of a statement that I wrote, shared to express my remorse with the police officer and court. It was a bit excessive, compared to the statements of the other folks, but I’m a writer with a conflicted heart so what would one expect.

“The events of March 17 have made a profound impact on me as a person. Up until that night, I have never assaulted anyone, nor have I ever been in a physical altercation. My memory of my crimes is vague, but that doesn’t diminish my offenses. I am unable to explain my irrational behavior but do know that my actions earlier in the night had direct correlation with my crimes. I hold myself fully accountable for the crimes I committed.

Based on the lack of recollection of my crimes committed that night, this signifies a much bigger problem in my life. Though I cannot change the course of events during the time of my arrest, I can make significant changes to the way I choose to live my life. I took action immediately, sought an attorney that doesn’t just assist in resolving my legal issues, but encourages his clients to work on their underlying problems of addiction and abuse. Since March 17, I voluntarily committed myself to a treatment facility, where I focused on my underlying problem with alcohol.

Since March 17, I have not had a sip of alcohol, have attended weekly support meetings, and have a new outlook on my life. Although I wish I did not commit these offenses, as a result of the events of March 17, today I am at a better place for which I am grateful. I sincerely apologize to Officer W and all his fellow officers who work tirelessly protecting me and my loved ones. It is up to me to make certain the person you met March 17 will never rear her ugly head again.”

Court Statement, June 25, 2021

This statement was the first step of my redemption process.

To redeem one’s self isn’t an act to be taken lightly. It’s something that takes time and intention with a variety of factors at play.

The Weight of the Sin

Not all sin is created equal. Assaulting a police officer is considered much more serious then a mere traffic violation. They are not viewed and treated the same.

My heart was weighed down by my actions four years ago. I needed to make things right not just with the court and officer but myself. Redemption is what allows me to free my heart.

It’s a process that isn’t once and done but requires steps.

Redemption – The Stages

How the Four-Step Process of Redemption Can Guide Us Toward Positive Change I found this blog post helpful in creating Redemption Freeing Ourselves From Sin.

1. Commit To Stopping – Immediately, the day after I committed my crime I decided it was time to stop. I needed to stop allowing alcohol control my life (I put a halt to my drinking). It required putting a plan in place and changing the way I did life.
2. Avoid Temptations – I needed to remove myself for forty days for a reset. Not only to distant myself from the alcohol, but the people who I had become codependent on with my drinking. God wanted me to Himself and with others who were facing their own struggles. I needed to build the strength before I was ready to reenter civilization.
3. Look Under the Hood – For the next several months and years (an ongoing process) I need to introspect my own life and determine why I was behaving as I did.
4. Step Into My Higher Purpose – To remain free from my illness I had to develop coping skills and a reason to stay healthy.

The Weight of the Punishment

Following the arrest in 2021 I had several people who thought it was their job to punish me. Close friends would turn their backs, gossip, and send nasty messages. It’s not for anyone else to determine another person’s punishment, just like it’s not for me to decide your punishment.

We need to live with what we do and if we haven’t had a life changed, then we will remain sick and broken. Freeing ourselves from the punishment from others provides a clear path for our redemption. Recovery is about breaking free of the bondage of our sin and addictive behaviors.

Redemption Through Jesus

God knows our heart. He sent Jesus to make a way for our redemption. As humans we are all sinners and by accepting a relationship with Jesus we can be freed from the consequences of our sin.

Through Christ we are no longer on trial in the court of public opinion. Jesus died for our sins. It is through Him and not any one person that sets us free.

The U.S. Judice System is flawed, it’s an imperfect system based on man. It’s set up to enforce their laws. Some people get wrongly charged, while others get away with their crime.

A judge, jury, and your peers do know your heart. I sat in the courtroom surrounded by criminals, each fate determined by our justice system. My latest run-in with the law serves as a reminder I am no better than anyone else. Just like you are no better than me.

The day of the trial I was given the opportunity to make a verbal in-person amends with the officer I assaulted. And, I read the above statement to the court. The entire process took the full morning, in which I sat through the sentencing of dozens of other criminals. Hearing each story while seeing their faces gave me a sense of compassion. These were all human beings who had made poor choices, many of whom are addicts. It is not my place to judge, nor others to judge me for my actions.

My life is no longer on trial. Timothy Keller’s shares how in Jesus Christ you get the verdict before the performance. “The ultimate verdict is in. You cannot justify me. I cannot justify myself. It is the Lord who judges me. Romans 8:1–2 (NLT) ‘ So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.’”

Court is adjourned.