Peace it’s something that is elusive. When you think you have it it just slips away. And when you need it it goes MIA. Peace where are you when our world is falling to pieces? When a loved one has been diagnosed with cancer? When I don’t have time to get on my damn yoga mat?

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The yoga instructor prepares me as I settle into my yoga pose and my body starts to melt into the mat. Each class she starts with a positive message, including tips on how to achieve a peaceful presence.

But this morning there is a tone, an unsettledness in her voice. She shares, "Today is Friday the 13th and to prepare for class I did some research. But... after discovering the basis of the holiday I decided against it (she makes a sound of disgust and chuckles). It's too religious."

We start to move at a frantic pace to the beat of her story. She shares her experience of being anxious and not present this past week.
When boom... the truth comes out, she only made it to her yoga mat twice this past week and the result an obvious disturbance. It must be on her yoga mat where she finds her peace.

If she only understood the peace that transcends all understanding.

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Peace where have you been all my life?

I went through most of my life in search of something that I discovered smack dab in the middle of my heart. At the age of fifty following a self-induced traumatic event I was desperate for a semblance of peace. My life had become unmanageable and I was unable to cope with the world that surrounded me.

Peace is the freedom of disturbances and in life we will have disturbances. So how can peace exist when we live in a world that works against us? Does it even exist? Or simply have I been looking for it at all the wrong places?

My Childhood

I grew up in an angry home. The adults did more bickering then sharing words of endearment. As a family we attended church to appease my mother’s spiritual thirst, but there was a lot of door banging to get us out of bed.

My Adulthood

The news played 24/7 not just in my home, but in our parents homes. My view of the world was tainted by a news media and political system created to cause disturbance. My husband accompanied me to church to quench my spiritual thirst and usually I was dehydrated from the night prior.

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Where do we find peace?

People find peace in the most unlikely places. But the peace they are seeking is temporary and once it is gone the vicious cycle continues with peace being a fleeting memory. Coping skills help to maintain a peaceful presence, but even having good coping skills doesn’t help with lasting peace.

Peace are you out there somewhere?

I certainly don’t see much peace in the world around me. We live in a world that is purposely divided to create a rift. For years I was led astray from a life that promotes peace.

Our country is politically divided when we should be “One Nation Under God.” We, the USA, is preparing for another election and once again I think the goal is to disturb the voters, not encourage us. When we follow the ways of world it leads to a spiritual death. Which for me is a good thing because that opened up the doorway to my heart for peace to settle in.

Within the rooms of recovery you will meet people who choose to respect and offer compassion, both are natural by-products of recovery. These are the people I choose to be inspired by and learn from, not the people of the world.

Peace are you in this bottle?

It called out my name at the end of a stressful day, seducing me into it’s elusive feeling. One glass is really all it would take, until it became two. My solution to the political unrest was alcohol and I was dependent on my wine for peace.

The problem with peace in the bottle is you need more and more to receive that same feeling of elusiveness. This builds a tolerance and forms an addiction. And there is nothing peaceful about living life fueled by alcohol.

Alcohol wreaks havoc on my emotions. It interferes with brain signal transmitters that control emotions. I used alcohol to calm me, but once engaged and triggered my emotions would take over.

Peace where are you? Oh there you are at yoga!

When I switched up my lifestyle to not be dependent on alcohol for peace I quickly discovered new coping mechanisms. For years I thought yoga to be sleepy and for people who don’t like to workout. Boy was I wrong… Yoga offers a great workout while offering relaxation.

The instructor reminds us to take our practice off of our mat. Meaning all of the lessons we learn can be used in all areas of our lives. The lessons taught in my yoga class align with what I learn from my recovery group.

Yoga promotes positive energy, but doesn’t satisfy my internal cravings. Much of my life disturbances come from what I don’t understand. Achieving peace is an act of faith for me and yoga doesn’t satisfy that need.

Is there peace on the Pickle Ball court?

While I have discovered coping skills from my faith and useful life lessons from my yoga instructors I watch my husband struggle with finding his peace. He says he has it, but his actions prove otherwise. Pickle Ball is where he has decided to look for his peace.

Pickle Ball is a competitive sport and for a man who likes to win that leads to one disturbed man. Yoga is an exercise discipline that we compete with ourselves. There is no comparison and we work at our own level. Pickle Ball is about performing for others and there isn’t much peace in that.

And when we can’t make it to the mat or the Pickle Ball court because of an injury the peace received from the activity is useless. Working out our aggressions isn’t the same thing as establishing peace. Peace cannot be found by doing an activity.

Peace is found in my religion.

My yoga teacher’s rhetoric that morning did nothing for instilling a tranquil yoga practice. And the more she talked about her angst my peace was being snuffed out. Until quietly while on my yoga mat my mind tapped into my heart’s energy and allowed myself to be led by the Spirit.

My disturbing thoughts turned into grace and gratitude. My instructor had a rough week and apparently frowns upon Christianity. I too was once her and I get it. Today I can be grateful to have a practice that is with me and resides in my heart.

What is ironic is that she closed the practice with a song by Zachary Knowles, Slow Down My Thoughts. The singer starts by saying he want’s to try something new and continues sharing how someone prayed for him when he was stressed and felt alone.

Prayer is the answer. I can prayer for my yoga instructor that she opens her heart to the possibility of Christ working in her life. When we deny the rich history of Christianity we are slaves to the world. Then she will understand that Christ dwells in our hearts and that is where peace that transcends all understanding comes from.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.
John 16:33  NIV

For those struggling to understand the Christian and how through Christ they are maintaining their peace read Spiritual Awakening vs. Indoctrination: The Truth Revealed.