Authenticity in Writing: Life isn't rainbows and unicorns.

How often have you been true to yourself to find yourself rejected by others?

Yesterday, I had a first… I published my Substack newsletter, Sybil says, “It’s okay to be an asshole”, and I encountered my first unsubscribe due to offending someone. And, I am okay with that because my writing style isn’t for everyone. Authenticity in Writing: Life isn’t rainbows and unicorns is my response.

Ralph the Boor

Each day before the crack of dawn, hours before the roosters crow, Ralph roamed the streets of Neffsville, Pennsylvania. Ralph was a hardworking man who delivered milk for a living. Following his milk route, Ralph could be found at the local school. He also worked as a crossing guard, making sure all the little boors crossed the street safely, while the grown boors yelled obscenities at him.

Ralph’s dream of owning his own dairy business did not come to fruition.
Ralph had a hard life.

Eventually, Ralph turned into an boor. He was the type of man who would fight with the attendant who worked at the KFC drive thru over white and dark meat chicken. Ralph’s wife, Mary, did her best to settle Ralph down.

Together they welcomed Bonnie into their lives.

Bonnie the Shrew

Bonnie was the only child of Ralph and Mary. She was brought up spoiled and had grown accustomed to getting her way. She learned from the best. Bonnie was a woman you didn’t reckon with. She knew how to get the job done.

Bonnie achieved success.
Bonnie didn’t have a hard life.

Over time, Bonnie’s get it done attitude made her appear as a shrew. She was the type of woman who would tell the waitress how many ice cubes she wanted in her water. She said, “Jump!” and they would say, “How far?” Bonnie then met Carl. The two balanced each other out.

And, then Jeff was born.

Why authenticity is important in writing.

The above excerpt is from Sybil says, “It’s okay to be an asshole” is the PG version. When I write a post I am deliberate with my words. Each word is used with intention and should add to the post. Each person who reads my written words will be impacted differently. I can’t consider how and if my words will offend anyone. I need to be true to myself and allow others to decide if my message and the words I use are acceptable to them.

It is not my goal to offend my audience, so it is important that my audience knows who I am. My writing comes from my heart and mind. It is through my heart where I listen to the Holy Spirit speak to me and shape my message. My mind will formulate the words of my message but my heart needs to discern what is appropriate to say for my intended audience.

My writing genre can be classified as Christian literature because I share scripture and incorporate those words into my message. It is through my testimony, the way God is using my life, that I can serve others by sharing my words. My audience isn’t necessary the devout Christian but the human who struggles each day. I want to show up in my writing as the person I am, not the perfect person that I will never be.

The purpose of the grow-together blog is to encourage others to grow with me. I don’t want to do it alone. Please accept my invitation to join my journey of growth by subscribing below. By sharing your email address you can expect approximately two weekly post, one from WordPress and another from Substack.

Offensive Language and the Christian Community

Offensive language has no place in the Christian community. I am not one to use curse words in my everyday conversation. As a Christian woman I prefer to use words that lift others up and not speak in a derogatory manner that disrespects others. The Bible states:

Let know corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
Ephesians 4:29 ESV

Seldomly, I use a few choice words that do not sit well with “certain people” in the Christian community and I respect them if they choose to unsubscribe. My overall message is not to corrupt anyone but to build others up. We are imperfect humans and behave as humans do.

I am not holier-than-thou, just a woman struggling to get through each day. Perhaps, in the eyes of a few I am not using biblical discernment. Although I like to reference the Bible and scripture, I write as a human. I am a human before I am a Christian.

I am a human before I am a Christian.
Karen Esbenshade

Who is Sybil and what does rainbows and unicorns have to do with authenticity in writing?

To read the “R” rated Substack post, Sybil says, “It’s okay to be an asshole,” for the full explanation.

Learning about authenticity and writing while on the yoga mat.

Sybil is one of my Yoga instructors and one of the reasons I like her is because she is authentic. As we flow through our practice Sybil incorporates a message. A curse word might slip from her mouth and the music she plays might be questionable for a few. I don’t think this behavior makes her a bad person and I am not easily offended. I just go with her flow.

When I do Yoga I fully relax and that is when my mind is clear. My words start to flow with a clear head. So while Sybil is instructing us to break down our ego on the mat, she is also telling us not to compare ourselves to others. She is very inspirational.

Life isn’t rainbows and unicorns.

Not only do I draw inspiration from Yoga and the written Word found in the Bible, but in my daily life. Life is messy at times and the people I hang with are like me, less than perfect. So I prefer to speak their language when I write.

My writing style doesn’t just reflect my relationship with Christ, but with the people who I choose to do life with. I don’t feel comfortable with the person who can’t be their authentic self and I know some people struggle with that. I want people to show up as they are and know they can simply talk to me with their choice of words.

If we maintain our coping skills then we can deal with life’s challenges. There will be no need to turn into a boor or shrew to get the job done. The negative actions are much more displeasing to me than a few choice words.

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.
1 John 3:18 NIV

We all have room for improvement. As imperfect human beings we will be offensive at times, but it is up to each of us to find the right coping skills to deal with life’s daily challenges. I found mine. Now I encourage each of you to find yours!