The struggle is real my husband pouts, he’s missing pickle ball in lieu of attending church on Sunday morning. This past Sunday I had enough and demanded he turn the car around. No man will acquiesce to my will, for the sake of marriage, but I will acquiesce to God’s will for my life.
What is worse than being forced to attend church on a Sunday morning is having to attend an additional Wednesday evening service. That was my husband’s upbringing. For me I remember the Sunday morning door banging, as my mother aggressively pleaded for her family to get out of bed. Attending church shouldn’t be forced but a yearning to want to enrich our lives spiritually by crossing the threshold into the sanctuary.
It can take one woman to shut down, Sunday morning, Pickle Ball in my seaside town. The stakes are high. Will the sport fizzle out, not allowing the men to work off their aggression (option A)? Or continue to thrive by a woman who chooses to acquiesce to the sport (Option B)?
If we choose option A, the men will be forced to find an alternate activity, perhaps by attending church to appease their wives. Certainly, it only will add to their bitterness and growing resentment, nothing that a relationship with Christ can't heal.
Option B demonstrates how little a husband values his marriage which further drives a wedge within their marriage. At the same time when placing our faith in God the marriage can be strengthened, because in due time the husband will be injured and in need of God's grace and healing.
What's a woman to do? Is it worth for the marriage to suffer for the sake of restoring peace or submit to God's plan for my marriage?
She can forfeit a union built upon the sanctity of marriage or he could take one for the team.
Who should acquiesce to who?
What is it to acquiesce to?
The Cambridge Dictionary states acquiesce, a verb, to accept or agree to something, often unwillingly.
The biblical interpretation according to BIBLE Students DAILY To acquiesce means to be at rest; to be yielding and not resisting no matter how severe the trial our Heavenly Father may permit to melt us, humble us, mould us, teach us how to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21, NIV) and sacrifice for the good of others, knowing it will lead to the greater good and which will bring glory and honour to GOD and which is centered upon RIGHTEOUSNESS – as this is THE ONLY STANDARD our Almighty Heavenly Father accepts, and it can be achieved through our intentions being reckoned as righteous thanks to Jesus Christ’s ransom sacrifice on Calvary once for all, for the sins of ALL humanity.
God’s Will for My Marriage
In simple terms, attending church is my personal choice. It quenches my spiritual thirst and strengthens my relationship with Christ. I am learning to submit my life, not my husbands. I don’t want him to submit to me but do it for himself.
When we married twenty-eight years ago, we took an oath under God. At the time I wasn’t mature enough in my faith to appreciate the vow I took. Today we remain married not just because of that vow but we are making a choice.
My husband does choose to attend church but on his terms and I need to accept that. As long as we both remain open to our faith we will both continue to grow on our individual paths. God’s purpose for our marriage is that we can be a light to others, which will strengthen not only our relationship, but the family unit and the community we live in.
Acquiesce to God’s Will
A main area where I see a difference between my husband and myself is that I am learning to acquiesce to God’s will, whereas my husband wants to remain living on self-will.
I have discovered that I can achieve peace when I quietly consent without protest what I cannot change. After I exhaust my free-will I am able to give in to God and trust in his plan. It’s a personal choice.
No longer am I competing against a life that I know I will not win. While my husband’s competitive spirit is driven by his need to win a pickle game. When he loses he sulks and that includes the giving into attending church.
Acquiesce to Our Spouse
My husband actually told me a couple weeks ago that he was acquiescing to my request to go to church. I don’t want a husband who acquiesces to anything in my marriage, let alone church. A marriage should not be built on acquiescing to one another but submitting to one another under God’s plan.
I want no part of my husband’s bitterness and resentment. It’s on him if he wants to blame me for missing a pickle game. His whiney behavior is an attempt to steal my peace. My solution is to attend church to help restore my peace.
It’s not about acquiescing but being willing to meet my husband where he is on his journey with Christ. I can choose to pray for him and then place my trust in God. That is what a healthy marriage looks like to me.
It’s a Choice
As a Christian woman involved in recovery and church I see this struggle quite often. The women yearn for their children and husband’s to attend church with them. We attend church for ourselves and by doing so we can be the light. When we force our religious views on others it leads to bitterness and resentment.
The world and everything in it that people desire is passing away; but those who do the will of God live forever.
1 John 2:17 GNT
By choosing God’s Will I will live forever in his kingdom, not a slow painful death on the pickle ball courts.
Leave a Reply